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Song Details
Rank this week: 67 (↑7)
Duration: 2:48 
Release Date: 1978  (Tim P. Ryan) 
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Song Lyrics:
Open me first at Christmas.
Said the tag for her to see.
Upon my gift wrapped shoebox.
Beneath her plastic tree.
And even through the airholes.
The smell of her cheap perfume.
Set my puppy tail a wagging.
Though it didn't have much room.

Open me first at Christmas.
Can't she hear me whine.
Open me first at Christmas.
I'm running out of time. I'm running out of time.

Her boyfriend stuffed me in this shoebox.
While I was fast asleep.
Being the runt of the litter.
The pet store sold me cheap.

I smelled chicken grease on his fingers.
And it made my hunger grow.
I heard curses through yellow chain smoked teeth
as he fumbled with the bow.

Open me first at Christmas.
Can't she hear me whine.
Open me first at Christmas.
I'm running out of time. I'm running out of time.

But now she's shaking my shoebox.
and it gives my little poocher heart a lift.
Oh soon she'll be unwrapping me
her warm and snuggly gift.

But but what is all this shouting
his other girlfriend on the phone.
Oh No Suitcases being packed and the door is slammed.
Christmas Eve and I'm, I'm all alone.
She's gone she's never coming back.
But I'll be a big surprise anyday when the apartment manager's niece opens me first come next Christmas day.

Open me first at Christmas.
Can't she hear me whine.
Open me first at Christmas.
I'm running out of time. I'm running out of time.

(jammin DIA)
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Current Rating 9.6 (4 votes)
Song Images:
Messages about the song: "Open Me First"
 
 
Tim P. Ryan   Offline  -  Participant, MP3  -  12-12-09 01:10 PM  -  9 years ago
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I have listened to my copy of the 12/23/1979 SYND DrD show, when this was still new and unreleased and heard an extra 12 seconds or so in this song.
After:
Christmas Eve and I'm, I'm all alone.
I hear Ogden (Bill Fenzer) having a studio argument with the studio engineer:
(spoken as music continues)
O: No, No. I, I can't go through with it. I can't kill the puppy.
E: Listen, Bill, we got, we got the A & R man. It's in the contract, you gotta put ?cras packaging in? Christmas. Now kill that poocher there.
O: No, No, I want Santa to come down the chimney and unwrap ?...no.. Honeydew? ..and, oh...
E: ?We're gonna be a hit,? now waste that puppy.
O: O-Okay ... (pause till it comes around on the guitar)
and returns to:
She's gone she's never coming back.
Between the ?'s is were I am not quite sure of what I am hearing.
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