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Song Details
Rank this week: 115 (↓12)
Release Date:
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Song Lyrics:
It was cold. It was rainy.
A cold, rainy day.
Though we lawyers love golf,
it was too wet to play.

Then I looked,
and I saw him step in on the mat.
He was looking for counsel.
We had a brief chat.

Did you do this awful crime?
Did you do it any time?

Did you take this person's life?
Did you do it with a knife?

I did not do this awful crime!
I did not do it any time!

I did not kill my former wife!
I did not do it with a knife!

Then F. Lee and I did not know what to say.
We were honest. We said, 'You got problems, OJ.'

These problems, we'll call them
Thing 1 and Thing 2
Thing 1 is the blood at the scene.
It's from you.

Thing 2 is the Bronco chase.
Why did you run?
We'll have to get rid of
Thing 2 and Thing 1.

I did not clonk her on the head!
I did not know that she was dead!

When I found out, I gave a sob.
Just ask my other lawyer, Bob.

I did not slash, I did not hit!
OK, I hit a little bit.

But I did not kill my precious wife.
I did not do it with a knife.

But, OJ, the chauffeur,
he rang and he rang.
Then Kato heard thumps.
He heard bumps, and a bang.

Then Furman, Vanadder, and Lang found a glove.
Things 3, 4, and 5 will need getting rid of.

I did not drop the bloody glove!
I did not kill my turtledove!

Too small! Too small!
It does not fit.

It does not fit.
You must acquit!

And sure enough,
The jury bit.

It does not fit!
We must acquit!

We don't much care who did this crime.
We've served a year, we've done our time.
Current Rating 10.0 (1 vote)
Played on 3 shows:
11-20-06, #MM-8309-07-97, #97-36
10-05-97, #97-40
= Show you can listen to online
Song Images:
Messages about the song: "The Juice a la Seuss"
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